Ironing is the Devil!

A few weeks ago I did something that I have sworn off many times.

I ironed.

You see, I have a process when I do laundry. I do NOT allow myself to go anywhere while my clothes are in the dryer. I must be there when the dryer is done so I can immediately scoop the clothes out of it and head off as fast as I can towards my room.

I then work like a madman (do madmen work really hard or something? Never understood this phrase) and hang everything up before the wrinkles set in.

I am convinced that hell is being in a room with an iron and a huge pile of wrinkled clothes. All day long you attempt to get wrinkles out of clothes...oh God, please save me! I didn’t want to see the movie Ironman at first because it sounded like a horror film to me!

It doesn’t matter how hard I press, how many times I spray starch, or push that little steam button, the wrinkles do not come out. The shirt or pants look just the same as they did before I attempted to iron.

Which leads me to my next point, and it’s a good one, with all the advances in technology how has the iron been forgotten? When cavemen needed to get the wrinkles out of whatever it is they wore, all they did was get a big rock and put it on top and moved it back and forth. What has changed?

We added heat and a few buttons that don’t do a thing. To be honest, we didn’t really even add heat because when you move something back and forth what do you get? Friction, or...drumroll...heat.

We can send a man to the moon, but we can’t improve the iron?

So inventors out there, I beg of you please come up with a new way to get wrinkles out of clothes. Please. I have shirts that I haven’t worn in months because they are wrinkled too much to wear.

Oh, and please don’t tell me that it’s already out there and it’s called “Wrinkle Release” spray. All that does is get my clothes wet. Then they are wet and wrinkled.